20 Ways to Find Your Calm in 2020

Black Mom's Guide to Calm

Happy 2020! A new year is here, and if one of your intentions/goals is to have less stress and more inner peace in your life (and honestly, it totally should be), I got you!

But before I get into the tips, finding your calm:

  • Boosts your mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health.
  • Can help reduce anxiety and depression.
  • Improves your focus and concentration.
  • Helps improve relationships (including with yourself).
  • Stabilizes your mood.

Now, here are 20 ways to tap into your inner peace this year:

  1. Meditate. Taking a few minutes a day (5 or 10 minutes) to get still and breathe can work wonders for your calm.
  2. Practice yoga. Start your own home practice with the help of YouTube or check out a class at a local studio (Check out Yoga Green Book for black-owned studios).
  3. Be in the present moment. Ideas for this: do nothing; focus on one task at a time; practice conscious listening when having a conversation.
  4. Relax. Catch up on one of your shows, read a novel, take a nap.
  5. Practice self-care. Do something every day to make sure you’re taken care of physically, mentally, spiritually and/or emotionally.
  6. Protect your peace. Whenever possible, eliminate the things that cause you to feel stressed, overwhelmed and/or anxious.
  7. Be grateful. Do your best (especially in moments of stress) to focus on the good in your life.
  8. Embrace where you are. You’re right where you need to be.
  9. Be kind to yourself. Allow yourself to be human. Treat yourself like you would your child and/or best friend.
  10. Use affirmations. The words you say to and about yourself greatly impact you and your life, so speak on what you want to manifest and create.
  11. Journal. Writing down how you feel is a great way to relieve stress and anxiety. Also, keeping a gratitude journal helps increase your calm and positive energy.
  12. Trust your journey. Know that the Universe/Spirit/your Higher Power has your back. Always.
  13. Protect your energy. Some ideas: spend time with high-vibing individuals; speak your truth; surround yourself (energetically) in a protective bubble of white light; consume media/social media that’s uplifting.
  14. Focus on what you can control. Don’t stress yourself about things you can do nothing about. Instead, focus on what you¬†can do and maintain your calm.
  15. Learn what your stressors are. When you know what’s actually stressing you, you’ll know whether you can do something about it (like get rid of it or make necessary changes) or if you need to be more intentional about creating calm practices.
  16. Try aromatherapy. A few scents that help bring inner peace are lavender, lemongrass and sandalwood.
  17. Use crystal healing. Great crystals for finding your calm include amethyst, smoky quartz, blue lace agate and howlite.
  18. Spend time with friends + loved ones. Do something fun with your girls, your kid(s) or your significant other.
  19. Slow down. All the things that you’re trying to do aren’t going anywhere, and you’re not in a race. Keep calm and take your time.
  20. Take deep breaths often. “Deep breaths are like little love notes to your body.” – Unknown

How will you find your calm this year? Choose two or three to focus on, then go from there. ūüíô

Guided Meditation for the New Year

2019 is here and well underway. And it's still a great time to get excited about the magic of what's to come and set (or remember) the amazing intentions for this year. 

In this guided meditation, you'll be able to do just that. 

My Theme for the New Year

Black Mom's Guide to Calm

One thing I’ve done for the new year for the past five years is come up with one word or theme to focus on. I don’t remember where I first heard about doing this (maybe Happy Black Woman?), but I really like the idea because it gives me something positive to focus on and is basically a goal or practice for the year.

With that said, My theme/word for 2019 is self-love.¬† This year, I meditated and slept on what my theme should be, and this is what ultimately came up. While I’ve been doing a lot of healing work the past year and a half or so, self-love is something that I’m still working on practicing, especially as it relates to my own inner dialogue.

If you’ve never done this before and want to create your own word/theme (or even phrase) for the new year, here are a couple of tips:

  1. Ask Spirit what your word should be. If nothing comes to you immediately, take a few minutes to meditate or sleep on it with the intention of it coming to you.
  2. Another option is to make a list of words that resonate with you and choose one. Maybe it’s something you know you need to work on, a goal you’ve had, or something you’ve been thinking about lately. You can also think about how you want your year to be and/or how you want to feel this year.

Some ideas for words/themes:

Abundance

Prosperity

Health

Thrive

Success

Peace

Focus

I got this.

Self-care

Move forward

Ways to use your word

  • Make a graphic for your lock screen or computer background.
  • Create affirmations around your word.
  • Write down what it means for you.
  • Make a vision board about it.

Have you come up with your theme for 2019 yet? I’d love to hear about it! Leave a comment below.

Resource used: alwayswellwithin.com.

Creating Self-care and Calm Intentions for the New Year: 6 Things to Do

Black Girl's Guide to Calm

Happy New Year! I hope your 2017 has gotten off to an amazing start. If you’re reading this, you probably already have set some goals for the year. But do you have self-care and calm intentions? Wait, what does intention even mean? An intention is “to have in mind a purpose or plan, to direct the mind, to aim.” (healing.about.com) Having them helps us stay focused and on the right track with what we desire.

Why set intentions specifically related to calm? They will help you:

  • live from a space of peace
  • practice mindfulness and stay in the moment
  • stay calm and centered more often than not
  • create inner peace and contentment

With that said, here are five steps to create your own for 2017:

1. Get clear about what you want/need in your life. When it comes to finding your calm and practicing self-care, do you want to start a yoga practice pr meditate regularly? Or maybe you want to stay calm in stressful situations, get more sleep, or have more time to yourself. If you’re having trouble figuring out what you want and need so you can live from a space of peace, take a moment to get quiet, and ask yourself, ‘What do I need?’, then journal about it. Just write whatever comes to mind until you feel you have your answer.

2. Write it down. After you know what you want and need, write it down. As Erykah Badu said, “Write it down on real paper with a real pencil. And watch shit get real.”

3. Write affirmations. According to Chicken Soup for the Soul co-creator Jack Canfield, “an affirmation is a statement of your goal or desire now realized in the present time.” They are statements you can write down/record, then repeat and/or listen to regularly so you bombard your subconscious mind with the thoughts, images, and feelings you’d be experiencing if your goal was complete already.

Your affirmations should be positive and in present tense. For example, “I am calm and centered,” or “I choose to practice self-care daily.” Here are some to choose from or to draw inspiration from.

4. Schedule it. If your intentions include specific practices like yoga, meditation, reading more, or exercise, write down the days and even times you’ll practice¬†in your planner or calendar, or create a reminder on your phone. That way, you’re more likely to stick with what you want to do.

5. Start small. Doing this will help you stick with your intentions as well. If you try to do too much too soon, you might get overwhelmed and give up because it seems difficult. So, for instance, if you want to start a home yoga practice, consider starting with a few stretches in the morning and/or before you go to bed or doing a five or 10 minute sequence. If you want to begin meditating consistently, start with 10 deep breaths or a 1-2 minute meditation daily.

6. Find tools and resources to help you stay on track.¬†YouTube is a great place to find meditation music and yoga videos. You can also use a resource like The Black Girl’s Guide to Calm Experience for tools that will help you find your calm.

¬†“Stress is not what happens to us. It is our response to what happens. And response is something we can choose.” – Maureen Killoran

___________________________________________________________

Black Mom's Guide to Calm

 

 

7 Mantras to Start Your New Year Off Right (Plus a Free Printable!)

 

Black Girl's Guide to Calm

Using mantras help you focus on the positive and on what you want to happen in your life. Saying them regularly helps shape your day and keeps those intentions in the forefront of your mind, making you more likely to live the mantra.

Here are seven that I think are great to carry into this new year (and beyond):

1. Just breathe.

When you’re in a situation that’s causing your stress or anxiety, remember to stop and take a few deep breaths. That way, you’re calmer and better able to make good decisions concerning whatever you’re dealing with.

2. I am enough.

It’s easy to feel like you’re not doing enough as a mom, entrepreneur, employee, wife, girlfriend, friend, etc. and that you could be doing more. However, it’s important to remember that¬†you are enough and you do enough. You’re doing the best you can with the resources you have. Be okay with that.

3. I believe the best about myself.

What you believe about yourself and your life on the inside is what will manifest on the outside. Trust that things will always align for your best and believe that you’re the type of woman who can (and will!) co-create what she wants.

4. I am the best version of me.

It’s easy to get caught up in trying to do what other people do or be like they are, particularly when it comes to social media. But you have to take your eyes off of others and work on being the best YOU that you can be. One of my favorite quotes is from Kimora Lee Simmons: “Live life on your own path. Everybody’s got something different. You can’t keep up with all those people, so you better keep up with yourself.”

5. I live in the moment.

Commit to going with the flow and staying in the present, and watch how calmness becomes a bigger part of your life.

6. I let go of what no longer serves me.

Letting go of people, situations, beliefs, etc. that don’t benefit you any more allows you to make room for better.

7. I am open to receive all the good Spirit has to offer.

Spirit wants you to have good in your life, so stay positive about what you want, do your best to feel good, and take inspired action.

“I know for sure that what we dwell upon we become.” – Oprah Winfrey

Want a way to keep these mantras fresh in your mind? Download my free printable to be inspired to make them a part of your life! Go here to download.

Out With the Old, In With the New: My Intentions for 2016

 

Black Girl's Guide to Calm

Happy 2016! I hope you all had a safe and fun time bringing in this new year.

In the past, I’ve created goals for a new year, but this year, I decided to write intentions. Why?¬†Because intentions help me¬†become clear about what I¬†really want and it allows me¬†to not worry so much about how something will happen. Instead, I¬†take inspired action, then allow Spirit/the Universe to let my¬†intentions manifest. That’s not to say that goals and action don’t have their place (they do), but intentions just feel less rigid than goals.

What’s the difference?

According to zigizen.com:

Goals focus on a fixed outcome in the future, while intentions focus on the present and provide the guiding light to living mindfully moment-to-moment.

Goals are an effort to achieve a set of results in the future, which we accomplish or fail to reach based upon the objectives and actions we take along the way.

Intentions help point us with more clarity toward our heartfelt aspirations and values.

My intentions for 2016 are:

  1. Practice mindfulness; stay present.
  2. Have a lot of fun.
  3. Be happy.
  4. Be a profitable entrepreneur.
  5. Let go of what doesn’t serve me.
  6. Practice self-care.
  7. Love; express love instead of judgment.
  8. Do me.
  9. Step out of my comfort zone.
  10. Be the best version of me (in every area of my life).

To make these intentions a reality, I’ll further define the inspired action I’ll take, and I’ll write them down every morning.

Here’s how you can¬†create your own intentions:

  1. Determine what you really want to see happen in your life and how you want to feel and be, then write short sentences describing it.
  2. Next, figure out what inspired actions you can take to bring your intentions to life.
  3. Write down your intentions at least once a week.
  4. Feel good about what you want, then watch everything come together.

Here are a few quotes to inspire you:

“Our intention creates our reality.” – Wayne Dyer

“Live your dream. Create your life. Lead¬†with intention.” – Leslie Schwartz

“Live with intention.
Walk to the edge.
Listen hard.
Practice wellness.
Play with abandon.
Laugh.
Choose with no regret.
Appreciate your friends.
Continue to learn.
Do what you love.
Live as if this is all there is.” –¬†Mary Anne Radmacher

“It is more important to be of pure intention than of perfect action.”¬†– Ilyas Kassam

Photo Credit: Ruslan Gilmanshin

#CalmTip: Decide What YOU Want

Black Girl's Guide to Calm

 

It’s almost¬†2016, so now is the perfect time to figure out (then write down) what you want to see happen next year. But when you do, make sure it’s what YOU want.

At times, we tend to want or do something because it’s what someone else wants for us. Pursuing a life our parents or society thinks we should have can¬†leave us feeling frustrated and anxious because we know it’s not what¬†we truly desire. Decide what you want for yourself so you can be fulfilled and live a life you love.

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.” – Steve Jobs